How To Be Every Fiction Writer Ever.

Hello Everybody!

It's been almost a year and a half since I've started writing on this blog. I like to think of it as an interesting piece of my subconscious self.
The part of me that does do all the thinking and calculating and emoting. Which is why you, as a reader, probably find half the stuff on here- complete and utter gibberish

However, in order to grow both as a writer beyond the confines of this blog and a become a much more comprehensible human being, I figured it's time I pulled up my socks and tried to assimilate and emulate every fiction writer ever. Or at least pretend to be one.

In my quest to be Fiction-Author-Extraordinaire, I stumbled upon the various techniques and must-do's by the who-ha's of the crime-fighting-myth-busting- heart-breaking world of great stories i.e, namely Stephen King, John Green, Jonathan Franzen and Kurt Vonnegut.

So what does it really take to make a great story? 
I've done a little research and distilled the following pointers that I personally thought were essential.
Here are my
Top 10 Tips On Writing Every Fiction Story Ever 

#1 Do Your Research
Before you embark on your monumental expedition on penning down the actual book itself, it's important to stress on just how important it is to bring YOURSELF up to speed on just what it is you'll be spending the next 1-2 years on (oh yea, writing a long story, i.e, a novel does a long time)

You'll need to think of your plot, your setting, your characters, the abominable act of "eliminating" said characters off at some point in the novel etc.

 #2 A Nice Hook Opening
"The problem was... I was dead."
See! caught your attention didn't I? It's little phrases like that that draw your audience in.

 It's the simple principle of leaving them hungry to know more. It's essential to have a hook opening because it keeps them -the readers, interested and alert to all that's happening at once.

#3 One Central Protagonist
This is crucial. Ever heard the saying too many cooks spoil the broth? They weren't kidding when they said that. Often,I feel that the plot of any good novel relies on the omnipotence of one guy/gal who leads her compatriots onward and out of the misery they've been facing together.Prime and notable examples being:
- Katniss Everdeen (The Hunger Games)
- Harry Potter
- Tris Prior (The Divergent series)

 Add one too many a protagonist, (or the lack of thereof) and you're bound to have a lack of a leader that holds your reader spell-bound whilst moving the story forward. Hence a protagonist is more than important. Which leads me to..

#4 Be a Sadist
Sure we all balled our eyes out at Fred's untimely death in the Harry Potter series. Of course Augustus Waters deserved more numbers than what he got and surely Tris Prior deserved to live to see her freedom.
But you see, if it weren't for these untimely/cataclysmic horrors, we as readers wouldn't have been prompted to read on and find out what happened to the rest of the characters within the story.
Lets face it. Without a devastating, gut-wrenching loss in the middle of a page-turner, nobody would have anyone to point fingers at. Which is exactly the kind of dramatic, nail-biting substance you want your story to be.


#5 Suspense, Suspense. Lots of Suspense
Never give away a damn thing. Never have any reasonable rational going into any action any of your character's do especially in a moment of crisis. especially if its good 'ol protagonist 'X' himself.
Give your readers the benefit of the doubt. Leave them intrigued, hungry for more!

Every fiction story demands the need to feed off of other people's misery. Go ahead. Leave them hanging 😉

 #6 Vivid Descriptions
Think of it this way. you're telling a complete stranger how nutty your grandma is. Surely they don't know your grandma in person or just how nutty she can be. So you venture out into great detail- the events that unfolded that morning when she told you how lovely she thought you'd look in that pinafore dress! Red polka dots with the most outrageous blue sequinned hemline than shone in the morning sun. That and the red she always imagined you'd have in your blonde pigtails.
give your audience a vivid taste of what's going on

My point is, as an author it is your job to tingle the senses. You are literally the eyes and ears of your readers. Give them just enough to appreciate whilst not bombarding them with a shitload of sensory information. Balance is key!

#7 Be Relatable
A lot of your content will be based on your own personal experiences to some degree. However be extra sure to make your content appealing to the age-bracket you're looking to branch out into.
Not to brag or anything, but a prime example would be this blog.
Now this isn't some literary piece of greatness, but I still try and keep everything as relatable as best I can towards the teens I gear my content towards.

Being relatable is not just a part of the "cool-factor" quotient. It also means your audience is more emotionally and mentally attached to the plight of the protagonist and other characters within the sphere of the story.

#8 Use of Third Person
Now onto the more boring stuff such as diction, tone and tense. I find writing everything except biographies and memoirs in the third-person to be a highly effective method.
Its all about perspective

writing in third-person gives the whole story a very birds-eye-view/outsiders-point-of-view angle.This convinces the reader that everything the character does or says is justifiable at the very least. It also gives the audience a very unbiased view of the matter at hand
Very effective. Much impress. Wow Wow.

#9 Passive Voice, Passive Author 
The passive voice can be really irritating as a reader. Honestly as an ardent reader myself I can confirm that use of passive voice as a tone IS NOT endearing. As the great Stephen King once said- "Timid writers like passive verbs for the same reason that timid lovers like passive partners. The passive voice is safe."

#10 Write for Yourself Not Others
And finally, on a most hypocritical note- write any story to make you happy.

 Not your mom or your sister or the entire globe. Just plain, goofy old you. At the end of the day when you write a story, you’re telling yourself the story. When you rewrite it, your main job is taking out all the things that are not the story and retelling it to an audience.
 Be happy, lest you characters get depressed themselves. 

and that's where I think I'll end this.
Good luck to any and all in their pursuits of becoming Fiction-Author-Extraordinaire!
Come to think of it, if you put your mind to it, anything and everything is achievable. Even the most complex stories :)

Until next time! 
Your Pretentious Book-worm


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